First time sick =(

Nathan is sick. He has been congested in his nose for a few weeks but thats pretty normal. We use saline drops and the dreaded brain sucker and all seems to be well. Then Monday he got this terrible cough. I could hear it rattling and feel it in his back. Went to the pedi Tuesday and she said his lungs are clear but its better to nip it in the bud now than deal with it once it gets down in there. So, we have a handy dandy panda bear nebulizer that we use with saline to help break things up. Im glad we aren't having to give him medicine just yet! Saline doesnt count =) It doesnt appear to bother him much but I hate it for him that he's sick.

And to make it better, my cough is back. Yuck! Maybe I will breathe over his shoulder while Im giving him his nebulizer and see if it doesnt help me too.

Tonight is our NFP (natural family planning) class with Heather. I dont want to do back on the pill and I had pretty clear signs before so I feel pretty good about it. It will be nice to see Heather again too.

back to work

I came back to work today. its only part time this week but Im back. I miss Nathan. I pumped under my desk (blinds are not in yet and see previous posts about people opening my door) and realized how much I love nursing him. Its our quiet time together when nothing else in the world matters. le sigh what can you do? Maybe my FIL will win the lotto this weekend and I can quit. A girl can dream right?

So they have not reconciled our check book here since I did it in July. You cannot imagine the PITA it is to fix what they messed up. How hard is it to write a check and write it down. ::pulling hair out:: I have been working on this for over an hour when it usually takes me all of 10 minutes. ::chanting "Paycheck" over and over::

I cant wait to get home and have a little boy try to chew on my nose when I kiss him.

In other news...
We spent the weekend with my family in St Pete. It was a really nice visit. My grandfather looked so blissful holding Nathan. I have so many fond memories with him so Im glad I am able to see him with my baby. Makes me miss Grandma Kay even more but I know she met Nathan before I did.

TMI but his poops are back to brown. Wahooo but they stink to high heaven. Boooooo I dont know what happened but Saturday after we got back from breakfast with Tracey, he went and it stunk. damnit man. This wasnt supposed to happen until he got on solids right? I dont think he got the memo.

Jeremy and I had a great date night for our anniversary. We went to the Columbia at the Pier in St Pete. We will definitely be going to the one in St Augustine. Such a great meal overlooking the water. Took our time and relaxed while mom had Nathan. I didn't even call to check in =)

We also bought a video camera so be on the lookout for snippets of our life. Got a Sony hard drive camera. Im excited to not have to mess with tapes or disks. Seems pretty easy for now.

Back to this stupid reconciliation.

2 month check up

Nathan had his 2 month visit today. We really like the new pedi. The old ones were great too but this is just so convenient and she is wonderful.
He was 10 pounds 15 oz and 24". Thats up 8oz and 1 inch in a week and a half. Still 50th percentile for weight but now 90th for height. Go figure!

We are doing an alternate vax schedule (Dr Sears) so today he got DTaP and Rotovirus. The nurse said all the kids so far have either vomited, spit, etc the roto but he took it down just great. I had just fed him so i kind of expected something but he was wonderful. He only fussed for about 15 seconds with the injection too. Here's hoping next month goes as well.

She told me to wait longer to feed him at night too. I've been getting about 4 hours once we go to bed but then its every 2 hours the rest of the night. Its my fault though b/c I get him up to eat before he actually wakes up so he doesnt get fussy and bother Jeremy too much. I just hear him grunting with gas or smacking his lips and get him up. Then he doesnt end up eating well and falls asleep nursing. This could mean he is getting more foremilk and less hindmilk and could be leading to the green poop. We'll see how it goes. Jeremy is a light sleeper so I expect crankiness from him for a while. haha

We are so blessed

My group of girlfriends follow several blogs of families that none of us know. They are sad and tragic stories of lung transplants/premie baby, losing a mother the day after her baby was born for no preventable reason, the loss of one triplet and others. Today, Kerrie posted about a baby who will be born tomorrow but will likely not live more than a few moments. I sobbed as I read the posts. I cannot even imagine.

I went into Nathan's room and cried over him as he was napping in his crib. I know that each cry, fuss, and dirty diaper is such a blessing. This family would give anything to have a "rough night" or poop in a just changed diaper or a load of baby laundry to do. They would do anything to have teething difficulties. It reminds me how lucky we are to have a healthy baby. When he cries, I know his lungs work. When he poops, I know his tummy is working. When he teethes, I will know he is growing up.

I pray daily that God continues to bless us with health and happiness for our little boy. I also pray that He blesses these families with the strength they need to face each new day.

Makes a momma's heart melt

We have been getting so many more smiles lately but they are hard to get on camera. Got this one last night after bath time. le sigh...

I just love a clean baby. All wrapped up and cuddly.

Took a big step today

So most of you know about my struggle about dealing with my dad. I havent talked to him in over a year and Im not sure why. It just seems to be the way it goes with him. There are times I feel like I should be the bigger person and just call but then I get pissed off that Im always the one to call. Its been like this for years. The only time he called me was when I kept my sister for a week.

Anyway, he does not know about Nathan. Or even that I was pregnant. I struggle with this decision daily. I also struggle with not having told the rest of that side of my family. So today, I called my favorite aunt from my childhood and told her and caught up for a few minutes. Im glad I did. She said to just join the club of Neil being a schmuck. I think she is a founding member since she had to grow up with him! Regardless, Im glad I can share this part of my life with her.

Who knows, maybe I will step up and be the bigger person one day and call him. If he would just make one shred of effort, I would return it 10 fold. I guess that is putting a condition on love though. I just would hate to tell him and him not be excited or make any effort to be a part of Nathan's life. It would be the biggest slap in the face and how would I ever explain that to Nathan? So, I keep hiding from the possibility.

clean vs dirty

I vote that babies know clean from dirty. For instance, a brand new clean diaper is the only thing suitable to poop in. In fact, it has to be so fresh that it doesn't actually make it off the changing table. One that has been on for an hour is certainly too "used" to add more to.

A clean set of jammies is in dire need of spit up of course. The outfit they have been in all day is not good enough. Bonus points for getting it freshly washed hair.

And my favorite from today: clean sheets, clean momma. I stayed up when he woke up at 5:30 this morning and got my shower while he went back to sleep. I had just changed the sheets last night. I crawled back in bed and snuggled him next to me. When he woke up, I thought I would try nursing laying down. It wasnt as easy as I hoped but we got it. I dozed off. It was great. Then I wake up to him moaning/grunting. He's pretty gassy so I thought he was working on that and its not usually a big deal. Next up was about an ounce of freshly ingested milk. All over me, the bed, him. Note to self Nathan, dont poop and eat at the same time or you will wear it on both ends!