8/31/09

Let me start by saying that the opinions expressed in my blog are mine. I am entitled to them. Part of why I have not been blogging much lately is I know more people are reading it. I have things to say but know someone will get their panties in a wad so I keep my thoughts to myself. But you know what, too bad. I have opinions and sometimes they are not popular. so be it. Just because my opinions and thoughts differ from yours, does not mean I am judging you. ok, sometimes I judge. who doesn't? but mostly, I am just thinking out loud to myself. This blog started as a place for me to journal and has morphed into a way for others to keep up with us. Nothing wrong with that but I am far too lazy to start another blog :-)

Today marks Nathan's 3rd week of daycare. I guess he likes it well enough. Here is my thing. I feel like it is my job to raise him. I should be with him, not sending him off to be with someone else all day. I feel like it is our job as parents to make the sacrifices we need to in order to be the one to raise our kids. I feel like by forcing myself to find something else to do (ie paying job) that I am somehow neglecting my primary responsibility. It feels so forced. I have no desire to be this big career woman. I want to be home with my son.

Here is the kicker though, I want to be able to do things and go places with my son and husband. Things and places take money. So does retirement but that is a whole other issue. So now, I am trying to find the best of both worlds. Something that can let me exercise my brain, earn a little money while letting me have time to be with Nathan for more than an hour at bedtime. Like today, I am going to pick him up from daycare and head to the zoo with some friends and their sons. This is what childhood should be about.

I know, I know not every family can make it work to have one parent stay home. I get that. Again, I am not judging anyone. Hell, I am the one looking for a job so I am in no place to judge. It is just that to me, the ideal would be to be at home with him. (can I mention that I HATE having to justify myself and preemptively apologize in my own blog.....) it took 2 weeks for him to bring home the first day care funk. I feel so guilty for sending him to a place I know will get him sick eventually. I know a runny nose wont hurt him but it makes me especially thankful to have prevented it for a year.

other things on my mind.

~After his first week at daycare, I co-hosted a bridal shower for Pam. I left early Saturday morning while Nathan was still asleep. I had nursed him maybe an hour and a half before. Well, apparently he woke up as soon as I left and did not quit screaming for several hours. He, like all toddlers, likes his routine and we messed with it big time. He was asleep when I got home and fought nursing when he woke up a few hours later. fast forward several days and he was still refusing to nurse. To say I was crushed is an understatement. I was not prepared for him to just up and quit. I know, I made it to my goal of 1 yr. Actually, it was one year to the day that he started to latch. I cried and cried. I knew he was teething so I thought it might be that so I kept pumping. Then someone suggested he could just be mad at me for leaving most of the weekend. That motivated me to keep pumping in case it was just a nursing strike. I had a talk with him one night and told him I was sorry he was sad or hurting from his teeth but that I love him and will accept his choice to be done if that is what he wants. The next morning, he signed milk so I tried giving him pumped milk in a sippy but he did not want it. I tried water, no good. So, I tried to nurse and he latched. I actually cried on his little head.

The pleasure of nursing is not something I can explain. To look down at him and see that smile and milk dribbling out of his mouth gives me the biggest smile. There is nothing sexual about it and it really is something I think more mothers should do. Outside of medical/psychological reasons not to, it is the right thing to do. Your body was made for it! Not to say that bottle fed babies are not bonded to their parents, far from it actually, but the bond I have with him after breast feeding him for so long is just more than I can describe. I have no plans on when I will wean him. Right now, i am hoping for 18 months or so. if he drops feedings before then, ok. a little longer, that is ok too. I truly had no idea how much I enjoyed our time together until it was gone. so each time he nurses now, which is only 3x a day, I enjoy the moment as if it were the last time. I think that is why it was so hard when I thought he was done. I took each feeding for granted and never made peace with the possibility of him being through.

~Nathan can now sign the following: eat, more, drink, milk, daddy, please, up, waves bye/hello, and is blowing kisses. He tends to use "more" for food/eat but really, as long as we know what he means, we are ok with it.

He is pushing cars around the house and loves the rubbermaid drawer. empties it out every single day. He loves bubbles and playing outside. He loves loves loves his ride on car. He knows how to push the button to make it go and beams with pride. He has discovered the playground and wants to go for a walk every day to play on the slides. He still loves going head first over the couch or bed. He has 5 teeth and a couple more on the way. Books are a daily joy. Brown Bear, Polar Bear and 10 Little Rubber Ducks will never get old. He especially loves story time with daddy before bed. Daddy's favorite is Oh The Places You'll Go.

He is the light of our lives and we are so thankful to have been given such a gift.

nathan's 1st b-day

nathan's 1st b-day 8-8-09 Video by Heather - MySpace Video

Shared via AddThis

This is a video that my sister took of the festivities. He loved his cake!!

this week

More details to come. If I don't get it started when I'm thinking of it, I will forget.

Nathan learned how to stand up on his own. No more pulling up for him! He has also started what resembles running. Like I need him to move any faster!

Last week he quacked like a duck. It was more kak kak kak. so cute.

Had round two of the first hair cut yesterday. We went to Doodle Doos and it was a much better experience for us all. They specialize in kids cuts and he did great. Looks like a little man even more now. I dare someone to call him a girl now! I have lots of pictures and will update later.

He has started to blow raspberries/zerbers/farts whatever you want to call them. He does it on the side of his arm, my neck and my belly. It is freakin' hilarious. He is so proud of himself too.

He has learned that if he bends down a couple of the guards on the snacktrap and shakes, the food comes out. Thrilled that he learned this, obviously.

This has been a rough food week for us. He has been eating so well lately that it came as a shock when he literally stopped last weekend. None of my go-to foods would do. Luckily he still nurses so we just nurse a little more often and it seems to be ok. Clearly he is not lacking energy. I think it has to do with his tooth coming in so hopefully we will be back on track soon. I am not of the force feed persuasion so if nursing works, I am going to roll with it.

I think that about covers it for now. I will add pictures later on.

New videos

Nathan being chased by his alligator

Nathan eating watermelon

New "tricks"

Being a boy laughing at farts

Enjoy!

slacking again

I have lots to write but will keep it brief. He will be 10 months on Friday! He is so full of personality and grows to be more of a little man every day. He is walking all over the place now. Still crawls when he wants to get somewhere quickly but is walking so much now. It is so amazing to see how proud of himself he is.  He says Ma-ma, da-da, and bye-bye (while waving)! He has given me the signs for more and food a couple times. Not consistently but I know he knows what the signs mean.  We started pool time with him today and he loved it. I think we are going to have a water baby on our hands!  He has discovered the joy of pulling toilet paper off the roll. I hated to laugh but it was so cute. I took tons of pictures and will post later. He has 2 1/2 teeth and another trying to cut. The half tooth has cut but you can't see it yet. Just feel it. 

Bath time is over so its off to nurse and get him to bed! As always, I will try to do better with more updates =)

He is 9 months

He has been out for as long as he was in. Hard to wrap my head around that. On Sunday, he took two steps between Jeremy and me. We just looked at each other in disbelief. He has not done it since but I know it won't be long. My baby is growing up. boo hoo boo hoo =(

Yesterday, we had pictures taken. So much change from 3 months ago. He is not camera shy at all! We had a hard time with him keeping his hands and props out of his mouth but I can't blame him. If I had teeth coming in, I would chew too. 

Today, we went for his 9 month check up. Here are his stats:

16 pounds 4 ounces  (3rd%)

28" (45%)

head is 5-10%

He passed his vision screening and she said he has slightly low iron. Very good visit! We will give him more red meat and more oatmeal with iron to boost it. Lord knows he isn't short on energy or anything.  He got 2 more shots and did great with them.  I know not everyone can do the alternate schedule but I have to say I am so glad we are doing it. He tolerates 2 shots well but 5 may be a little rough. I wouldn't want that many at a time so why would I expect my infant to be ok with it? The extra visits are worth it to me. next month we go back for polio. We have some decisions to make about the full MMR vs breaking it up. Mumps is not available so there is a risk but I feel like I am ok with that. He will get that portion with the booster. Our pediatrician delays MMR until 15 months anyway b/c its a lot to give with Chicken pox at 12 months. So, we have a little while to decide. We'll see. 

Happy Mother's Day to me!

I had a nice trip home to see my sister's honor roll ceremony. I don't remember them making a big deal about it when I was at that school. It was more of a "here's your bumper sticker now move along" kind of thing. I'm glad to see this improvement. The kids got all dressed up and it was a nice program. Nathan was a rock star even though it was well past his bed time. He snuggled up in the sling and I swayed in the back of the room.   

I did not end up going to mom's as she was not feeling well. I was sad not to see everyone but having just gotten over the funk, I understood how she was feeling. Plus, I was not in the mood to bring more funk home. We will plan another trip soon.

We had a lovely Mother's Day weekend. Saturday we went to a dear friend's daughter's 4th birthday party. I cannot believe this child is 4. Had a great time and as always tucked ideas away for Nathan's future parties. The best part of the day was taking a nap! Jeremy and Nathan had some daddy/son time and I got to take a 2 hour nap. Divine! When I got up, I had my cards and gift waiting for me. I got a charm for my charm bracelet which is exactly what I have been wanting. My grandma had a silhouette  for each grandchild with our name and birthday. When she passed away, I was given mine back. I put it right on my bracelet. So, now I have the boy version for Nathan and I love it!  

Sunday morning we got up at the crack of dawn (5:30.....) and headed to Vidalia to my in-laws. The whole family came in and we had a low country boil. mmmmmmmm  It was so nice to visit with everyone and Nathan was such a good boy. He tried to take a nap but my stupid phone went off and woke him up. His highlight was Nonna giving him a cob of corn to gnaw. Loved it! Papa gave him a pickle later in the day and he gummed it to an inch of its life. Such great treats!  Nonna gave Nathan a sink bath, put his jammies on and we headed home around 6. It was a long day but worth it to see everyone.  

Happy Mother's Day to all the new mommies and mommies to be out there. I hope everyone was pampered and loved and your day went just as you hoped it would!